days like this.

Listening to: country music on shuffle. Remembering why I love Carrie Underwood.
Quote Love: “So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when really, shouldn’t it be the other way around?” Kathleen Kelly, from You've Got Mail.

On days like this, I sit on the floor with a book on my lap and a cup of cold coffee on the floor next to me. Think, read, dream & drink coffee. The clouds are slowing rolling in, gradually darkening the sky. It smells like freshly mown grass & rain outside. I'll still be awake when it starts to rain. I'll go out and lay on the trampoline in shorts and a tanktop. I'll put my sunglasses on, the plastic ones that won't rust, so the water doesn't run into my eyes. Someone will come out to join me, and inevitably, we'll begin pushing each other down, slipping and falling on the slick surface.

Can skin be thirsty? Mine is. It’s thirsty for rain. For water pummeling down from the thick clouds, Sinking into my skin and running down my eyes. My ears strain to pick up the sound of the thunder, My eyes, for the sight of the lightning slicing the black sky in two, for the feeling of the water. My soul is thirsty for God the way my skin is thirsty for rain.

I'm feeling nostalgic today. Maybe it's the weather, maybe it's the beginning of a new school year, maybe it's the jeans and sweatshirt I've been wearing all day making me wish for cooler weather and changing leaves. It's the most beautiful time of year, filled with so many different memories. Bringing out the hoodies, jeans, and boots. Drinking hot cider and snuggling down in camp chairs at the edge of the soccer field. Raking up leaves then jumping in the piles. It's my favorite time of the year.

The mornings have been thick and foggy, each day the fog lingering longer than it did on the previous day. I wonder how long the mornings have been like that, and if I'm just now noticing since I'm awake then. From the porch I can barely see past the corn fields on the far side of the road. It's misty, beautiful, and mysterious. Anything could be behind that mist.

School has gotten off to a good start. Two days down, one hundred and seventy-eight to go.

changing names.

I've decided....

Beauty Like a Kaleidoscope.

From the Natalie Lloyd quote:

“Beauty isn’t some pinpoint we’re all shooting for aimlessly. Real beauty is more like a kaleidoscope, shining out of every part of our lives.”

You'll be able to find me at beautylikeakaleidoscope.blogspot.com.

I'm not sure when I'll switch it, cause I start school tomorrow. I want to make a new header and have it ready before I change the name. I hope to have it switched at least by Wednesday, and I'll be back then with some better posts. Possibly something about the three Israeli kids I spent time with last Friday at the airport and the Hebrew cuss words I learned. Possibly something about convincing my parents that I didn't need to take Latin again. Possibly something about the Hokey Pokey. You never know.

Thanks so much Natalie for letting me use your quote for my title! I really appreciate it. :)

home.

It's been so good to be home. I missed my family so much, and it's been amazing to be back with them. I loved being at church on Sunday and getting to see everyone. After working at middle school youth group on Sunday night, Ali came over. We spent the night at my grandma's in the little cabin down by the pond. That night we were sitting on the benches down by the pond when a bat started flying above us. It kept flying closer and closer, and all of a sudden it flew into Ali's arm. We all screamed and ran back into the bunkhouse and slammed the door shut. It was a fun night.

I just won a giveaway today! I'm getting a print and a set of notecards from this Etsy shop. I can't wait until they get here. I requested "Get Me Out of Here," in 11x14. I cannot wait to see it. Thank you so much Mandy!

I finally read the book that I've been wanting to read since before I left, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. It was so good. In the next week or so I'm going to read it again slower, much like I did with one of Donald Miller's other books, Blue Like Jazz. I think that I've read that book three or four times this summer.

I've gone swimming nearly every day since I've been back. It's rained. I've biked and trampolined with my sister, and we re-did a chair. It's been a good almost-week back home. Missing everyone there.

going home.

Leaving tonight at midnight. I fly into JFK, then onto Indianapolis where I'll meet my parents. I can't wait to see them, but just not ready to leave.

to do: (everything last minute.)

Listening to: Looking Up, by Paramore.

Quote love: “It hurts to love, but it’s worth it. Love wouldn’t be so beautiful if you didn’t have to die a little bit to create it. Love has always cost pain.” Donald Miller.

1) Go to Petra.

Petra is a Nabataean ruin, a city carved into a hill. The archeological dig that I went to was built by the Nabataeans, both over 2000 years ago. Everyone keeps telling me that I need to go, and it's something that I've planned on since the beginning of the summer.  Likely I'll go on Thursday, cutting it just a little close to when I leave.

2) Shop.

If you know me well, you know that I'm not much of a gift giving person. I do like to give and receive gifts, but it's not the most important thing for me. I do want to bring back things for my family and friends, and I haven't gotten much at all. We'll try to go downtown tomorrow, maybe, so that I can get some things to bring back with me.

3) Pack. 

This is just as, or more, important as the other two, but just a little easier. I already have everything except for my clothes packed up, and thankfully, I have enough room. I'll probably finish packing on Wednesday night or Thursday morning. 

I'm just a little concerned about getting everything done, after all, I do only have two days left. The closer I get to leaving, the more I'm ready to get home. It's been a really great summer, and I'm not at all ready for it to be over, I'm just ready to be home.

(giveaways)

Hannah @Aspire is giving away a beautiful necklace. Personally, I like the Sahara one the best.

Lindsay @Content in Christ is giving away one of her handmade purses from her Etsy shop. I love the brown and pink one.

and...Carlotta @Pastor's Girl's Ponderings is giving away four prints, and a necklace. I want one of those prints *so* badly. 

Thanks for doing these giveaways!

word collage.

Listening to: Dare You To Move, Switchfoot. 

Quote love: “As she walked past him, her eyes flitted up to his face. He was looking at her too. They both blushed slightly, and continued on their way. They never saw each other again. If they had stopped to talk, they would have started to date, gotten married after two years, had a lovely daughter named Clarissa, and had a fairy tale ending. Instead, she was killed when a car ran into her at the side of the road, not ten minutes later. He, lived a lonely life, never dating, and died at fifty four of a heart attack.”

It's really, truly almost over. Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. And then I'm gone. I leave the country at 11:55PM on Thursday. Land in New York the next morning. I'll stay there during my ten-hour layover, then it's on to Ohio and from there, home. 

Home.


Goodness, that word means so much. I absolutely cannot wait to see my family. I don't like leaving them for this long. It's weird, because being homeschooled, I spend a lot of time with my family. They're always around. I've missed that. 

I can't stress how grateful I am that I was able to come here. Thank you so much for praying. Thank you for sending me money so that I could come. It means a lot to my family and me. 

It's hard to believe that summer is [nearly] over. It seemed long and endless when I first boarded that plane in Ohio, now it seems that it's gone quickly. Lots of things are like that. You don't do what you want because you think, hey, I have plenty of time, I'll just put it off. It doesn't last forever. 

So school's almost here. I'm one of those people who like to start school in the fall. It feels good to have something to do again, something that challenges you. I like the idea that I can choose how the year is going to go. I like freshly sharpened pencils and new, unopened notebooks. I like the anything-ness that comes with a new school year. You don't know how it's gonna go. You don't know what's going to happen. It could be anything. 


The beginning of school comes with the beginning of fall. I love fall. I love the leaves, the freshness of the air. I love sitting in camp chairs at the edge of a soccer field, yelling at the players on the field. I like it when it rains during one of those soccer games, and I snuggle under an old blanket that was lost in the back of the truck. I like new fall traditions. Last year we drove up to an orchard. We picked the apples off of the low trees, occasionally climbing up some of the limbs to reach the good apples at the top. The ones that had fallen to the ground were free. We ate our fill of those. Every so often I would turn around and duck to avoid a somewhat rotten apple sailing out of my brother's hands. The sun was shining that day. It was warm enough that I wore a tank top, covering my neck with a scarf. I still like that outfit, purple tank top covered with a grey scarf. I wore my favorite pair of skinny jeans and my hand-me-down Vans. Those shoes had no traction, and because of that I slipped on rotten apples and slick grass more than once. My camera was in my hand more often than the apples I was supposed to be picking. The pictures I took that day are still some of my favorites. We look happy and, more importantly, we're all together.


After we filled up the back of our purple Suburban with apples, we drove to one of Joseph's soccer games. We were early then, and the rain was just coming down, lightly. I borrowed a long sleeve t-shirt from my brother as we walked around the outdoor festival in the little town. The rain started pouring down at the soccer game. Halfway through the game, Mom pulled out the thermos of hot apples cider. We passed it around, inhaling the the cinnamon and nutmeg. The woods on one side of the soccer field were bright spots of yellow and orange through the thick rain. The air smelled like fall. It was perfect.

I have been tagged!

Rules: answer the questions and pass it on to four others. 

4 Things found in my bag:

A school bag? Right now, there's nothing in my backpack. Here in a couple days though, I'll fill it up with my laptop, books, hairbrush, and other things for the plane ride.

4 Things found in my purse:

1. My wallet.

2. My phone.

3. Pen and notepad.

4. iPod and headphones.

4 Favorite things in my room:

1. My window.

2. My bookcase.

3. My wall with pictures and quotes.

4. My clothes.

4 Things I’m currently into:

1. Home. Have you heard I'm leaving in three days?

2. Photography!

3. Quotes.

4. My followers. :)

4 Things I bet you didn't know about me:

1. My middle name means "star of hope."

2. I use Blogger in Draft, not normal Blogger.

3. My favorite fruit is pomegranate.

4. I'm not gonna live in America when I grow up.

I tag: Paper Bird & Little Fairy, Sophie, Ali, and Olivia.

 unedited?

 

edited? 

Which one looks better? I can't make up my mind, I love them both so much. 

these different kinds of happy.

I love reading my old journal entries. Most of the time I do this at night after I finish writing. I start flipping through the pages, looking for something that interests me. Today I was looking for the date on an old entry and found something that I wrote about the stars:

"When I look at the stars, I feel like myself." When I look at the stars, I can be myself. The stars I see at night aren't a mirror of myself, but rather a beautiful road pointing towards the me that God created. When I look at the stars, I feel alive. I feel as if anything is possible. I feel like all my failures, all my shortcomings, all my never-perfects don't matter because I can see God through the stars. Looking at the stars, I'm nothing. Not visible. Not important. Not noticed. I'm small and nothing, and yet it doesn't bother me. Because in the middle of my beautiful nothingness, I am something to God. He sees me, he hears me, he knows me, he loves me. Even while I stand there enveloped in night, just one out of billions, I am important. Blessed. Heard. Thought of. Loved.

The summer has disappeared and now it's almost over. I only have a few days before I have to leave. The closer I get to leaving, the more I'm ready to be home. I was listening to Carrie Underwood earlier today. Her song Wasted came on and these lyrics caught my attention:

For one split second
She almost turned around
But that would be like pouring rain drops
Back into a cloud

I've been feeling a lot of that lately. Wanting to stay here, and yet at the same time wanting so badly to be back home.

I like the last two lines especially. "That would be like pouring rain drops back into a cloud." Rain is somewhat of an obsession with me. I guess that it started years ago when my family moved to the Netherlands. There, rain is common and everyday. My love for rain might have something to do with my mom. She has always loved it, and as a little girl I wanted to love everything she loved. I still love almost everything she does, the main difference being mashed potatoes. (the typical response when people hear that I don't eat them? "Katie, how can you even be American??")

Word on the street says that it's been raining the entire summer, and I can't wait to get back and feel some of that rain for myself. My house is a typical Indiana farmhouse, complete with multiple porches, covered and uncovered. On one of these porches, we have a cute little wicker porch swing. This swing is perfect to sit on and watch the rain. One of my favorite memories involved that swing.

I had just gotten back from a bike ride, and the whole time I was biking I could see the wind pushing the rain clouds towards our house. I took my sweet time, because there's nothing I'd like better than to bike in the rain. The first few drops were just coming down when I pedaled up to the house. I went inside to my bedroom, and picked up my copy of Anne of Green Gables. I grabbed a blanket and a pillow along with my book and went out to watch the rain from the swing. Every few minutes I would swing out far enough that I could feel the rain hit my face and arms. I'm looking forward to being home and feeling the rain again.

These pictures make my day:



It rocks my world how gorgeous that girl is (all my sisters are like that, as a matter of fact) and that sunset? I know that I've posted it before, but it blows me away how splendid it was.

Quote love: "When I get a little money, I buy books; and if there is any left, I buy food and clothes." - Desiderius Erasmus.

I'm agreeing with this wholeheartedly...I'm pretty much broke, and yet...a new Artemis Fowl just came out! I can thank my brother for this. He was the one who started me on Artemis Fowl...and Ted Dekker, and Christopher Paolini, which still remain some of my favorite books/authors. There are a few other things that I'd love to buy, mainly a Nikon D5000 or D60. Photoshop would be nice too. Right now, though, I'm content to just be going home to see my brother. :)

I just recently saw You've Got Mail for the first time. I loved it. Usually I never watch chick flicks, because it's just not worth the language and innuendos. This one is old enough that there's very little language, and it's pretty clean. I totally identified with Kathleen Kelly. I've always been the bookworm. One of my favorite scenes was when she was explaining the Betsy, Tacy, & Tib books to Annabele. When I was eight I loved those books, and every penny I had went to Barnes & Nobles for the next one in the series.

I want it to be October so I can sit next to my mom on our big yellow couch. Our new fireplace will be softly crackling, and we'll sit on the couch with hot apple cider and watch You've Got Mail. There's something about fall...

I've recently started looking forward to Tuesdays. Tuesdays are special. Not only are they the day before Wednesday, my favorite day of the week, Tuesday is new-free-music-day. At least that's what I call it. It's really the day when iTunes puts up new freebies. Sometimes, rarely, I like the free download and it's all worth it.

"If home is where the heart is, then my home is where you are, but it's getting oh so hard to spend these days without my heart." Thank you, Relient K, for saying exactly what I feel. I can't spend this much time away from everyone I love. Five more days....

three weeks turned into two.

Two weeks turned into thirteen days. Thirteen days turned into ten. Ten turned into eight.

Eight more days until I leave. The days just seem to disappear, and now I'm left with a week and one day. One week sounds impossibly less that two weeks.

It's hard to explain to people about how leaving feels. People who have never left, or been left, cannot possibly understand how it feels. I'm still trying to decide how I feel about leaving. I hate the thought of having to say goodbye to everyone here, but at the same time I cannot wait to get back home to everything there. It's weird to think about being home again because it's been so long since I was there. I keep saying how much I hate leaving. The only good thing is that this time, I'm leaving here but going home.

That's all there is to say that I haven't already said.